The go-to source for comic book and superhero movie fans. The writers prefer to go with long, drawn-out cutaway gags or dialogue-based jokes that take a few lines to get to the punchline. Quotes. 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I'll give you a hint. He also grew into Peter’s best friend when Cleveland left the show to star in his own spin-off. He’s kind of like my boss.”. Quagmire: I already got it! Family Guy Quotes. Share Share Tweet Email. Quagmire: Dad... Are you gay? Permalink: You put a real cougar on Cougar Town! Recap / Family Guy S12E3 "Quagmire's Quagmire" Go To × Edit Locked. — Stewie Griffin , Family Guy , Season 9 : And Then There Were Fewer. Joe: Aaaaand now there's no pie at all! Here's a clip of some Quagmire's giggity best. When the town of Quahog started experiencing a crime wave, the Griffin family decided to buy a farm. After riding along they become hooked on party buses and soon crash other buses, including one that hosted a guy's bachelor party. When Peter tells Glenn of his suspicion, he laughs it off and then defends his dad as a war hero. “Brian, there’s a message in my alphabet [cereal]. He hands his wallet over to the mugger, who comments on the fact that it’s white. Family Guy and all related characters, episodes and quotes are a copyright of 20th Century FOX. If they could just use their cell phones, the movie would be over immediately. He was once arrested for peeping on Lois in the girls' bathroom.He was also briefly married to a maniac named Joan. 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A one-stop shop for all things video games. In one episode, a fake PSA from the NBA showed a basketball player in bed with a woman saying, “Baby, I miss my wife so much. Quagmire ended up falling back in love with his old co-star and wanted to stay. Quagmire cracks, “What a surprise, the mugger’s never heard of Truman Capote.” As the mugger leaves, Quagmire tells him, “There’s a library card in there – use it!”. 0. Hey, get that one. Here are the 10 wackiest things Glenn Quagmire, the zany neighbor who looked like Bob Hope and was an infamous sex pest, has said on Family Guy. In “Joe’s Revenge,” Joe is obsessed with tracking down the man whose gunshot put him in a wheelchair. Stewie: Alright Brian, I'm gonna go up to the upper level and run this wire down through the wall. RELATED: 10 Ways Family Guy Has Changed Since Season 1. Quagmire is forced to take care of a baby he fathered when she is left on his doorstep, while Stewie creates clones of himself and Brian. He claims he likes women for their personalities but we only ever see him dating bimbos, and even then only in short-term relationships. Quagmire's dad comes to town for a veteran party. Or them lambs what ain’t never seen the light before.”. They couldn’t find it online, so they flew out to South Korea to find a copy of it. He does whatever it takes to help his friends and protect his sister Brenda, who was often beaten by her abusive boyfriend, Jeffery Fecalman, whom Quagmire hated. Jun 22, 2014 - Quagmire from Family Guy 47164d1372948543-5-word-story-glenn_quagmire_by_gan187-d3r70hu-png (900×1063) Jun 22, 2014 - Quagmire from Family Guy 47164d1372948543-5-word-story-glenn_quagmire_by_gan187-d3r70hu-png (900×1063) Explore. He's currently in pre-production on his first feature film, Hunting Trip, and has been for a while because filmmaking is expensive. I'm not gay. In Family Guy, the Griffins' neighbors Joe and Quagmire are a couple of odd fellows who keep things light with some funny quotes like these 10. — Stewie Griffin , Family Guy , Season 3 : From Method to Madness. Previously, he wrote for Taste of Cinema and BabbleTop. A one-stop shop for all things video games. Dan: What? When babies get showered with love and attention for doing something simple like yawning, Quagmire doesn’t get it. Tagged: Snark, SASS, Tweeting. When Glenn introduces Peter and Joeto him, Dan's dance to "These Boots Are Made for Walkin'" implies that Dan is a homosexual, much to his friends' chagrin. Recap; Create New . Trying to live life to the full in his final days, Joe brings some teenagers back to the guys’ hotel room to drink and as they sneak past sleeping Peter, Cleveland, and Quagmire, Joe tells the kids, “Be careful around the really fat one. While Quagmire started out his tenure on Family Guy as the neighbor who came out with wacky, erotic double entendres, he has since evolved into a sarcastic cynic. Unfortunately, he lost her, and has tried to fill the hole she left by having sex with women.He has pictures of Lois in his house, including on the inside of his closet door. Quagmire is the only one of his friends who is still single and doesn’t have any kids, which a lot of people can relate to. Crystal : I know this jail sentence seems long, but … Family Guy is an animated television series created by Seth MacFarlane for FOX in 1999. [whispering] Give her back to God. Travolta is also famously a pilot who owns his own plane, so the suggestion here is that Quagmire saw Travolta with a man and he gave him his plane to keep his mouth shut. Family Guy Quotes "Hello, 911? The episode ended with a hysterical parody of a K-pop music video starring Peter, Cleveland, and Joe, imploring him to come back to Quahog with them. Quagmire loses his Asians it's peters fault Family guy is copyrighted by Fox I OWN NOTHING He’s finally arrested, but then he’s later let out of jail and Joe decides to chase him down before he can leave the country. Quagmire: Well, if you're so smart, why don't you come up here and pick them yourself!? Dan: I am telling you the truth. With Seth MacFarlane, Alex Borstein, Seth Green, Mila Kunis. This is how Quagmire describes his life in South Korea when he was stationed out there with the Navy and began starring in a Korean soap opera. At the ball, Quagmire is soon bombarded by comments about his father's sexuality from fellow sailors. While fellow supporting character Cleveland took a brief sabbatical from the group to star in his own ill-fated spin-off (which is a lot better than it’s given credit for), sexual deviant Glenn Quagmire and Joe Swanson, a cop with a disability, have always been at Peter’s side. RELATED: Family Guy: 10 Funniest Running Gags, Ranked. Get out of here!”, When Meg is helping out Joe in Bonnie’s absence, he gives her a ride to school and struggles to make small-talk and connect with her. In addition to writing news and features for Game Rant and lists for Screen Rant and CBR, Ben directs independent films and does standup comedy. Peter: Ho, boy, they have got you. That feels really good. Directed by Jerry Langford, James Purdum, Peter Shin. Is that a band, or a soda, or a store, or one of those terms like ‘donkey punch’?”, RELATED: Family Guy's 5 Best Guest Stars (& 5 Celebrities The Show Squandered), Meg says, “No,” and Joe keeps guessing: “Is it a douche? This is particularly true of horror movies, in which a bunch of characters will get trapped in a cabin in the woods being stalked by a serial killer. An edit of Quagmire's 'best bits' from the Season 6 DVD of Family Guy, released on 15th October. In "Quagmire's Dad", Dan Quagmire arrives in town to be honored at the Officer's Club for his war service. Family Guy: Quagmire's 5 Funniest Quotes (& Joe's 5 Funniest) In Family Guy, the Griffins' neighbors Joe and Quagmire are a couple of odd fellows who keep things light with some funny quotes like these 10. RELATED: The 10 Worst Family Guy Episodes Ever According To IMDb. But Quagmire’s catchphrase “Giggity, giggity, goo!” has never gone away and never will. Thanks for understanding that we can’t do anything. Get that one. Quagmire falls in love with and marries the maid that Peter won on a game show only to find out that she's a psycho and must figure out a way to get out of it. All the latest gaming news, game reviews and trailers. Comment. Despite being a pervert and hypocrite, he has also been shown to have a kinder side. Quotes By Genres. Quagmire: You promise? 1 Synopsis 2 Plot 3 Characters 3.1 Major Roles 3.2 Minor Roles 4 Quotes 5 Trivia 5.1 Deleted Scenes After striking out with a girl one again, Brian desperately crawls up to his long-time enemy, Glenn Quagmire, for dating advice. It's Quagmire. We figure about 98% of you have heard it on Family Guy, and the rest of you have heard somebody say it at school or work—probably after they said something perv-y. Peter : I'm carrying three handguns, and the metal detectors picked up nothing. You don’t all wear a poop sack?” Then, he gets angry and yells over to his house, “Damnit, Bonnie, you lied to me about the poop sack!”, NEXT: Family Guy: Chris' 5 Funniest Quotes (& Meg's 5 Funniest). Dan: Son, you have my word. Peter says, “Man, I bet they got fancy food up there at Harvard. Quagmire: Yeah, no, definitely no tie. !” NEXT: Family Guy: 10 Best Stewie Griffin Quotes Family Guy: Quagmire's 5 Funniest Quotes (& Joe's 5 Funniest) Magz4You January 30, 2021. The characters have evolved away from them or the writers prefer to make meta references to the fact that they used to have catchphrases. [At the debate, Quagmire is … Or pigs with apples in their mouths. While returning his Apple laptop, Quagmire meets Sonia, a woman with a sexual appetite as voracious as his — and things turn pear-shaped when she kidnaps him for her sex dungeon. With Seth MacFarlane, Alex Borstein, Seth Green, Mila Kunis. The mugger hasn’t heard of the Breakfast at Tiffany’s author and Quagmire isn’t at all surprised. But the writers have incorporated all kinds of humor into the show. Glenn Quagmire Quotes You put a real cougar on Cougar Town! By Ben Sherlock 2 days ago. What...? “I'd like to stay and chat, but you're a total bitch.”. Anyway, here are Glenn Quagmire’s 10 Wackiest Quotes. Ben Sherlock is a writer, comedian, and independent filmmaker, and he's good at at least two of those things. Eventually, Peter downs the plane in the middle of the woods when he goes out onto the wing to prank Joe while it’s in mid-air. Hey! Previously, he wrote for Taste of Cinema and BabbleTop. Peter quickly befriends one of the party bus guys and they all hitch a ride. When Peter asked him how he got a private plane, he tells him that he “walked in on John Travolta with not Kelly Preston.” Family Guy has made plenty of jokes about John Travolta’s marriage with Kelly Preston being a sham. At the beginning of the episode, we saw the anarchy in a series of hilarious gags. [putting his hand on Quagmire's shoulder] Glenn, Glenn. She died after clutching onto Death's arm. The way Quagmire sees it, he flies and lands passenger planes every single day and no one ever gives him a pat on the back, so why should everybody praise a baby for doing something babies do anyway? Jaguar Enthusiasts Forum. He says, “Hey, can you tell me what that Lady Gaga is? Quagmire: Just tell me the truth! You know how much I love balls. Family Guy has its share of outrageous characters, but Glenn Quagmire has got to be the craziest of them all! But the writers have incorporated all kinds of humor into the show. Lois tries to pull him up and he says, “Pretend I’m your child, Lois.” He starts to slip and quickly adds, “Not Meg! As a made-up word to imply sexuality without explicitly depicting it, “Giggity” is in the same league as Wayne’s World’s “Schwing!”, When James Woods tries to steal Peter’s identity and claims that the clothes he’s wearing belong to him, Joe orders Peter to take them off: “You heard him, fella, take ‘em off. See more ideas about family guy, family guy quotes, griffin family. The show was cancelled in 2002, but after extremely positive response to DVDs and reruns on Adult Swim, production of new episodes for FOX resumed in 2005. It pokes its head in Quagmire’s bedroom window and he can be heard enjoying whatever it’s doing. 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